A Bollywood Movie for Civil Services Aspirants – Your GK will never be the same again!

  • I confess.
  • I watched a movie on TV.
  • I learned that a movie could be a learning experience too.

    Especially, a movie such as Players. This is a movie that every Civil Services Aspirant must watch, because it improves your General Knowledge by leaps and bounds – and you don’t have to work hard for it.

Well, actually, I might be exaggerating slightly. The movie has Abhishek Bachchan playing the lead, and keeping your eyes open when he is on the screen, can involve some work, but his presence is offset by the twin presences of the sizzling Bipasha Basu and the dazzling Sonam Kapoor. Then there’s a post-interval villain with three solid names – Neil, and Nitin, and Mukesh, who seems to have an incredible upper hand in everything!

But I’ll come to the point and tell you what I learned. This knowledge may hold you in good stead.

  • India has the best people anywhere in the world! India has the best hacker, the best illusionist, the best automotive expert, the best makeup artist, and the best explosives expert in the world.
  • Russians can’t defend their country. It is fairly easy to get into Russia, hire a train-engine, prop it up with turbo-accelerators, cranes, and whatnot, and run it alongside a train carrying Romanian gold – bullion worth $100 Billion, at exactly the same speed for about a third of the duration of a Bollywood movie, i.e. one whole hour, all you have to do it, is get Bipasha Basu to tinker with the engine and drive it.
  • The New Zealanders don’t have traffic police. Our Indian team with all that gold in tow (actually in the boots of three little cars) flit about their roads like bees gone crazy in a hive, but not a single cop is anywhere to be seen. Either the New Zealanders don’t have traffic police, or they don’t find enough gumption to come out when Indians go berserk on their roads. I wonder if they had seen this video before Abhishek and team wreaked havoc on their roads. (I salute the brave pedestrians.)
  • The Catherine Palace is not in St. Petersburg but in New Zealand, and you can buy it for $10Million. Or it was transported to Wellington in New Zealand, bought by three men called Neil Nitin Mukesh, destroyed by Abhishek Bacchan, restored in less than 48 hours, then perhaps transported back to St. Petersburg.
  • The Indian police attends coaching classes provided by some of its seasoned criminals and are tremendously respectful toward them. The way they talk to the law-abiding middle-class public could make you fear any chance encounter with them – but don’t worry, they are actually very nice when they talk to criminals.
  • Indians rule the world. Anywhere in the world, when we appear on the scene, others cease to exist. A handful of the original inhabitants (say Russians, Americans, or even the New Zealanders) that still are around, start stammering and they lapse into speaking English with a heavy Indian accent, regardless of their original accent/lack of accent.

You didn’t know all this before, did you? And this is but the tip of the knowledge iceberg. You’ll learn a lot more if you watched the movie – beware of the twists and turns though. This movie is so full of them that in the end, you are still left wondering if Bipasha Basu and those three men Neil Nitin Mukesh were still alive! (Sorry for the spoiler!)



About Anand

Parodist, Humorist, Caricaturist, Nerd.
This entry was posted in Bollywood Humor and Parodies, humor, indian humour, Parody, Satire and tagged , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

13 Responses to A Bollywood Movie for Civil Services Aspirants – Your GK will never be the same again!

  1. Arpita says:

    Hilarious! 😀

    Liked by 2 people

  2. BunKaryudo says:

    I haven’t seen this movie, but it sounds like a blast, and very informative too. It’s good to know that if I go to New Zealand, for example, I can do whatever I want on the roads there since there are apparently no traffic police.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Anand says:

      I doubt you’d see it Bun. It’s a Bollywood Heist Movie, which I am not sure was released worldwide. But yes, it’s very informative – and will surely aid you on your trip to New Zealand. Don’t go looking for the palace though 😀

      Liked by 1 person

  3. oneta hayes says:

    I put some new stuff in my knowledge file today. I’ll definitely keep the items that will be useful to me in the near future – that is, bullet points # 9 and 10. Did you look? Gotcha!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Anand says:

      Oneta, clearly you don’t appreciate the movie-maker’s attempt at educating the world about things that are usually kept from the curious public. But that’s OK. I don’t mind that smirk on your face, because I totally deserve it. It was one of my worst posts (barring the one I made today. I must not let darkness swallow me up!)


      • oneta hayes says:

        Oh, Anand, I just re-read my comment. See it’s time, 1:25 am. I was definitely typing in my sleep. I did not mean the 9 and 10 were my only useful bits from your post. I meant those in addition to the others. And I definitely like the inside info you gave me from the movie industry. I understand one can make a buck or two with insider informants. So sorry, my friend. Don’t let my sleep-talking disturb your dreams. I’ll have half my readers unfriend me, if I hamper your style. I’m hopping over to see what you add to my life today. I have one that is quite different today but I think you will like it – “More Salt will Make the Beans Saltier”

        Liked by 1 person

      • Anand says:

        I’m intrigued. I mean, who would’ve thought of it. “More salt will make the beans saltier!” My post today lacks the regular spices, but I hope you’ll enjoy my mom’s role in it. And those points in this post, both the visible ones and the invisible – they are meant to help the world see us Indians for what we truly are – Super Smart 😀

        Liked by 1 person

  4. Wandering Soul says:

    Here’s one more learning – Bollywood can’t make a decent remake to save its life. (Italian Job) Why did you even waste time on a movie that has 3 non-actors together – Bipasha Basu, Sonam Kapoor and Neil Nitin Mukesh. 😛


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