Arvind Kejriwal uses his IIT Math to Solve the Pollution Problem.

Anyone with any connection to Delhi must’ve heard this news. Arvind Kejriwal-led AAP Government has found a solution to Delhi’s pollution problem in the number theory. Cars with odd-numbered license plates will be allowed to grace the Delhi roads on odd dates and those with even-numbered license plates, on even dates. I am amazed at the brilliance of this idea. I wonder why couldn’t any of the previous Delhi Chief Ministers come up with it. Oh, I get it. They weren’t from the IITs, ji.

While I can understand how Mr. Kejriwal has suffered due to the polluted Delhi environment, and how he had to keep himself muffled-up through the last two winters but I can’t imagine how he kept the Aam Aadmi cap from falling off – and yes, the invisible crown too.

Kudos to him for balancing it all with such finesse and yet coming up with such brilliant ideas. He makes the IITians around the world proud. In fact, seeing that Arvind Kejriwal has returned to his IIT-roots with the number-game, I’ve been motivated to return to mine.

I trust that the even-odd number plan can be extended to many other aspects of Indian life, thus reducing the impact of the 3 painful P’s of India –  pollution, population, and poverty.

Here are three more suggestions, inspired by Mr. Kejriwal’s out-of-the-box but imported from China idea. I recommend a nation-wide implementation of these, but of course, they can be piloted in Delhi.

Pollution: 
(Applies only to Companies as Mr. Kejriwal has already taken care of the individual polluters.)
Take the first five letters of a company’s name, find the position of each letter in the alphabet, add the numbers of the positions, and determine if the number is odd or even. If odd, the company will remain closed on odd-dates; if even, then on even-dates. On the days the company remains closed, its employees will be required to ply cycle-rickshaws and contribute labor to the public transport system.

Population:
For each new married couple, add the man’s age to the woman’s age (completed years only) and determine if the sum is odd or even. If odd, they would be allowed one child; if even, they’d be allowed to choose between 0 and 2. If they don’t follow this rule, Arvind Kejriwal will adopt the extra children and the parents will not get the opportunity to gloat over their extra children’s accomplishments if any.

Poverty:
Add the number of thousands you earn. If you have an odd number of thousands, you will donate half your income plus one thousand to the Delhi Government. If you have an even number of thousands, you will donate only half of it. The Government will then distribute this wealth equally among those who vote for the current office-bearers in the next elections.

I am confident that if we put our heads together, we could use the odd-even number logic to resolve all the problems of the world – including terrorism. If only we could ensure that terrorists born on an odd dates would only be allowed to purchase weapons on odd dates and…